


White Day

by wintersunshine



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Best Friends, F/M, M/M, Teen Angst, girl bestfriend falls for Ten but he’s in love with Johnny :(, play Chet Baker songs and get in the mood, read at night when it’s raining and you’re all alone, side johnten
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2018-07-13
Packaged: 2019-06-09 19:45:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15274890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintersunshine/pseuds/wintersunshine
Summary: Ten Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul has managed to snatch her heart back in first grade when he accidentally hit her on the head with a basketball. Romantic. And ever since, she just haven’t found any other guy who makes her heart flutter the way he did that one rainy day in first grade.“Look, Ten, it was my fault too.” She folds her hands on her lap, fixing her gaze on the floor. “If only I learned to keep my feelings to myself then none of these would’ve happened. If only I knew better than to fall in love with my own best friend then I might still have you.”





	White Day

**Author's Note:**

> This one is for you who has a heart worth loving but whose love is never reciprocated.

The classroom was filled with students at eight in the morning. Some were wrapped in comfortable blankets and napping on their desks, some chattering in small groups and some were engrossed in their mobile phones all while waiting for the eight-thirty class to start.

Thailand was usually hot these days but somehow Trinny found herself staring out the window as raindrops slid down the transparent glass. She was always fascinated by the rain and she was thankful for that at this moment, for she has a reason to keep her eyes fixed on something else other than skimming the room and probably landing her eyes on something . . . or rather someone she can’t keep her eyes off of.

Trinny always sat at the very back next to the window because it was easier to go unnoticed by the teacher when you’re distracted and not paying attention that way. And Trinny, having the wild imaginative mind she has, always found herself stuck in a daydream of scenarios she will write someday.

The familiar buzz of her classmate’s chatter has significantly shifted to quiet whispers and giddy murmured comments. She looked over her shoulder and darted her eyes across the room to see what it was all about and that’s when she saw him. There he stood at the very front row, greeting his friends with that trademark beautiful smile of his. That was probably why the sun wasn’t out today; it got too shy to even attempt to compete with his smile. Trinny shook her head and willed the thought away. _Quit being sappy and gross, Trin._

She watched as he talked to his friends. His hair was perfect as it always was; long, dark and parted at the middle. His uniform, like always, was unbuttoned and yet he managed to look the most beautiful among the entire male population of Shrewsbury. Trinny grunted inwardly and mentally scolded herself. This was exactly what happens when her eyes land on him, she couldn’t stop looking and it’s been a problem since she was in grade school.

Ten Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul has managed to snatch her heart back in first grade when he accidentally hit her on the head with a basketball. Romantic. And ever since, she just haven’t found any other guy who makes her heart flutter the way he did that one rainy day in first grade.

She didn’t notice she’s been staring for too long until his eyes landed on hers and like she always did, she duck her head and looked out of the window.

Class went on like it always did; dull and boring. Trinny didn’t hear or understand a thing the teacher said. She was far too busy studying the back of Ten’s head and how his shoulders rose up and down every time he sighs or the way he scratches his nape and lean back on his chair. Everything about him was so mesmerizing and Trinny was far beyond mesmerized.

The hours ticked by and lunch time came. And just like clockwork her friends Gem and Liv invited her to eat lunch with them at the cafeteria. Trinny frowned and rested her head on the table while clutching her stomach. “I can barely stand. I have cramps.”

Gem and Liv gasped in unison and petted her hair, insisting to just stay with her and skip lunch but of course she wasn’t having that so they ended up going to the cafeteria leaving Trinny alone in the empty classroom.

She grunted, squeezing her eyes shut as she bends over, her forehead pressed against the desk. Why did this have to happen here now? She knocked her forehead repeatedly on the wood but not strong enough to hurt herself. She did it a couple more times just to distract herself from the pain on her stomach. Her forehead was about to collide with the desk when something out of nowhere cushioned her forehead from the collision. It took her a split second to realize it was a hand. Warmth spread across her chest and the back of her neck when she slowly lifted her gaze to see who it was.

She sat frozen as Ten placed a hot pack on her desk along with a carton of milk and sandwich. “Eat up. I’ll tell the professor to have you excused for the rest of the day. You should go to the nurse’s.” He patted her head once and then he was gone.

 

∞

 

_ I get along without you very well of  couse I do … _

The rain drummed on the roof. Chet Baker’s voice was drowned out in the background. The air was cold with a hint of the aroma of freshly brewed coffee coming from the kitchen. Trinny laid in bed listening to the rain and the sound of jazz. Her eyes were fixed on the unstained white ceiling but somehow her thoughts wandered. She always ended up thinking of him on days like this. She knew she shouldn’t for it will only cause her pain but then again we don’t get to tell our hearts what to feel.

Sighing, she closed her eyes, murmuring the words to the song.

_ …except when soft rains fall and drip from leaves that I recall the thrill  of being sheltered in your arms of course I do but I get along without you very well… _

The soft sounds were lulling her to sleep when her door creaked open. Slowly opening her eyes, she looked up to see him walking towards her. “Haven’t you heard of knocking?” She closed her eyes once more but not because she was falling asleep but because she wanted to avoid looking at him when he’s this close.

“The last time I knocked was twelve years ago, Trin.” There was laughter in his voice and she could feel him getting closer . . . and closer . . . and then he was sitting on the bed.

“Yeah, when you came to apologize for hitting my head with a basketball,” she retorted.

“But I brought ice cream, didn’t I?”

She smiled at the memory and wished it never came up. She did not need to be reminded of the things they used to be and beingthis close with him right at this moment was not helping. They don’t talk like they used to anymore. Nothing stayed the same after that White Day from four years ago.

I’ve forgotten you just like I should of course I have . . .

“What are you doing here, Ten? You don’t come here anymore. In case you forgot last time you were here was four years ago.” And just as soon as she said those words she immediately regretted them. There was no turning back now that she’s brought it up.

The atmosphere became heavy and the silence was uncomfortable but Trinny didn’t flinch. She stayed there with her eyes closed, listening to her favorite song playing on repeat.

“Trin, I’m so sorry.” Her heart broke the moment he spoke those words. She wanted to hug him and tell him that it’s okay and that they can still go back to the way it was before but she knew it was all a lie. The damage has been done. She got hurt and she lost her best friend.

She slowly opened her eyes but never meet his. “None of it was your fault, Ten.” She said it in almost like a whisper, her voice soft, almost like being careful to not break something delicate and fragile. She sat up and gingerly puts a hand on his shoulder.

“No, Trin don’t say that,” his voice broke and she could see his ears turning red. He was about to cry. “It’s been four years and this is the first time I’ve built up the courage to finally talk to you. I ruined what we had, Trin. I lost my bestest friend in the world. I lost the only person I could trust just because I was selfish.”

“Look, Ten, it was my fault too.” She folds her hands on her lap, fixing her gaze on the floor. “If only I learned to keep my feelings to myself then none of these would’ve happened. If only I knew better than to fall in love with my own best friend then I might still have you now.” She felt her heart clench and it took all of her to not break down and cry in front of him. It’s been four years. Four years since that one White Day when she finally decided to confess her feelings for him.

_. . . Except to hear your name or someone’s laugh that is the same but I’ve forgotten you just like I should . . ._

“I honestly don’t know why I got so scared like that and just walked out on you like that. Trin, the moment I walked out of this room was the moment I walked out of your life, all because I found out my best friend was in love with me. Eight years of friendship out the window just like that all because of a confession. I’m so fucking stupid, Trin.” Tears were already streaming down his face when he turned to face her.

Trinny looked up to meet his eyes and her heart clenched once more. “Don’t cry, Ten. We were just kids and it was just some stupid crush anyway.” She tried to laugh but it only made tears well up in her eyes. It was nothing like some stupid crush. She loved him. She was still in love with him. He was the love of her life but like any modern love story it doesn’t have a happy ending.

“You don’t love me anymore?”

Trin had to laugh, tears finally falling as she looked away from him. “I love you, Ten, and I always will. Sorry if the ‘stupid crush’ thing was confusing. I just didn’t wanna seem so desperate.”

There was a silence and suddenly Ten was holding her hand. What else was there to do? She just cried. This was her first love and no matter how strong her feelings for him are, it will never be enough to make him love her back. This was her first love and she had no idea how long it will take for her to find another person to love the way she loved Ten.

“Trin, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I fell in love with your brother and ended up compromising our friendship. I was so dumb, Trin. I love you so much you’re my best friend and yet I still did that. I can’t imagine a life without you. We had everything planned out and yet I chose to be selfish.”

She turned to him and reached a hand up to touch his cheek, wiping his tears away. If the breaking of her heart could be heard, they’d both be deaf now. “Ten, you love Johnny and he loves you so much too and I can see that. I’m happy that the two most important boys in my life are happy. I can’t ask for anything more, Ten.”

“You always, always put everyone else before yourself, don’t you?” He forced a smile and turns his face to kiss her palm that was on his cheek. “And that’s one of the reasons I love you.”

A bitter smile plays on her lips as his words tug on her heartstrings. “Stop saying that, Ten before I believe you’re actually in love with me.”

“I am in love with you, Trin. I always have been. And that’s probably why I turned my back on you because I was so scared of hurting you. I love you too much and yet I was already with Johnny.”

“You love me but you love him more.” She retracts her hand and gingerly wipes her own tears. “I can’t compete with my brother on anything. I love him too much. I’m just happy you’re both happy. I promise I will finally move on soon. Maybe not yet tomorrow but in the near future hopefully.” She smiles reassuringly at her best friend, her first love who she will probably love for a long, long time.

“Don’t smile at me like that. You’re making it hurt more.”

She caresses his cheek and leans forward to press a gentle kiss on his lips. “I love you, Ten. Always. I need you to remember that. But for now I guess this really is goodbye.”

_ I get along without you very well of  couse I do … _

 

 


End file.
